Friday, January 2, 2009

Santa Please by Jade Falconer

TITLE: Santa Please
AUTHOR: Jade Falconer
LENGTH: Short story (roughly 9k)
GENRE: Contemporary gay erotic romance
COST: $2.00

Taking a seasonal job as a department store Santa is a little demeaning for college professor Ian, but when he sees the gorgeous young James playing his elf, he decides it might not be as bad as he thought. Especially when James doesn’t hold back on the flirting…

Sometimes I wish I could write a note to authors and say, “You know, there is absolutely nothing wrong with writing an erotic story purely for the erotic factor. Truly. You don’t have to shoehorn in a romance into a short format if it’s going to make it completely unrealistic.” That’s certainly the case with this one. I had hoped that because of its length, this would focus on an erotic encounter, but no, that apparently is not the author’s intent. There’s a great sexual build-up to a rather steamy encounter, but then – in order to satisfy some romantic quota, it would seem – the story jumps forward a month to a sappy, unrealistic, unbelievable HEA. Any attempts to show me the development of the relationship are gone. I don’t even get the characters talking very long about much of anything but their attraction for each other before they’re hopping into bed together. Without those elements, how am I ever supposed to believe that these two love each other at the end? Oh, right, because the author tells me.

Because of the length and the focus on the first two-thirds on the erotic aspect, there isn’t a lot of character development in this. Ian is 50, James 25, but that proves to be only a very minor obstacle to their physical relationship. It doesn’t even really do much to add to the hotness of it, as in bed, it’s not an issue. The guys are likeable enough, but the dialogue never really flows naturally, and I’m left having a vague sense of bodies rather than personality. For an erotic story, that’s not necessarily a bad thing. For a romance, it’s the kiss of death. It’s a shame this tried to be the latter. It could have been so much more satisfying if it was just about the sex.


6/10 – As long as the characters don’t talk or get too romantic, it reads just fine.


4/10 – A body with some age to it…which would be fine if it didn’t have to veer into unbelievable romance


4/10 – Not offensive, but not particularly developed, either.

Entertainment value

5/10 – When half the story is sex, how am I supposed to believe any kind of romance?

World building

4/10 – Undeveloped, but not really necessary in this.



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